Months of Change

February 26,2019

I was reminded recently of my blog and had always felt it was a safe place to write and that no one I knew ever read it. Well out with some mates on Friday and was asked by a friend what had happened, she said she gathered something had and she noticed my blog link on instagram. SHE READ IT. 
Oh my I didn't expect anyone to read it. It had been a trying year and months. I hadn't written since last summer. So lots has happened since then. 
I had asked my Ex to fill in an affidavit so I could file for the divorce under the married but just living together since there had been no physical relationship in over 13 years. I asked him about the papers a few times and he finally answered back, once I had accepted his settlement, meaning he wanted me to settle for what ever he gave me. It's now February and I just refiled as I am in Australia and its been over a year so he can't hold the separation part over my head anymore.
The separation is going to mediation in March and they asked to have the venue and type changed but the registrar has said no and it will be better for me to leave it and the type where it is. Their way could see it drag on for months.

In October 2018 I was asked to go to Scotland to assist a family that the Mom had 2 cerebral bleeds and 3 kids under 7, this was just to much for her hubby to be handling not to mention he was trying to work a new job . Jennifer is a good friend of my daughters and I had thought about offering but waited till I was asked. I was the next day, of course my Ex heard about this and told people I was going on holidays. I didn't pay my way or go anywhere once I got there.
On my way there I was held up in Halifax for 24 hours because of plane issues. It took 5 hours to change our tickets and get vouchers. In the line I met a wonderful British Man Mark and his Son Jordan. We hit it off immediately, joking and making light of the fact were had all been awake now for 24 hours. We got things changed and were told to head to the end of the airport for a taxi. Just then I spotted one doing a drop off at the nearest door to us. I said come on fellas I'll see if he is heading back to the city. Thank god he was. We got in and Mark asked Michelle the taxi driver to look at our vouchers he is sure were going to different places, I said no its 2 hotels in one, He still argues and Michelle agrees he knows where we need to go. Finally Mark believes me. Michelle turns to me and asks how long have you 2 been married. I said were not I just picked them up in the airport. He had a good laugh about it. We all chatted easily on the 45 minute ride to the city. 
Michelle called my phone so we would have his number the next day he offered to take us a driving tour in the afternoon. Sounded great to us. While in line at the hotel Mark says to me is your name Sandra. I turned and looked at him and said I didn't tell you my name. He held up my hotel voucher apparently Michelle mixed them up. LOL  

I open my phone and notice a missed call, I say darn I missed a call. Mark says didn’t Michelle call and hang up, oh yeah he did, just then he is calling. I answer he says Jordon left his back pack in the back seat. Do we want him to bring it by now or give it to them later when we go for the drive.  I ask Jordan and he would like it now, so Michelle says he will bring it on his next trip back from the airport. It’s now 6:30 am we get in our rooms. I go to brush my teeth and discover that my shampoo has exploded in my make up bag, in my toothbrush and hair brush, it took me ages to wash it out. I got my pjs on and just laid down, its now nearly 7am. I hear a knock on the door. Its Jordan he wants to know if Michelle came back yet. I try to call him, no answer I assume he is driving. So I send a text, and tell Jordan I will let him know when I hear back from him. 15 minutes later he calls to say he dropped it off. Then I spend 10 minutes trying to reach Jordan and Mark to tell them but they keep hanging up on me, guess they didn’t know how to use a hotel phone.  I decide I might better take a hot bath as my back is sore from no sleep and standing in line to much. Its now 8 am so I figure I may as well try to eat something, I head to the breakfast buffet. I had some fruit and yogurt. I’m really to tired to eat. I decide that maybe I can lay down now and nap. I just get settled in and a knock comes to the door again. For gods sake can a girl not close her eyes for 30 minutes. It’s housekeeping, she wants to know when I am checking out. I had to work hard to refrain from bad language but I had had it, I said I just got here 2 hours ago and they said he had till noon. Oh she says sorry, I guess you were the people from the plane last night. I said yes we are. So by now its 9am and I decide I'm awake again and better see where the boys are. They are down eating, looking as tired as I am. I offer to take them on a walking tour of Halifax and they agree, They shower and I have the hotel hold our bags for us and off we go by 10 am. We walk and chat for hours poor Jordan is so tired he lost his brekky. Mark i discovered is a diabetic and all the walking is causing his sugar to go out of wack, farmers aren't use to walking they ride quad bikes or tractors. LOL  We head for lunch and finish up about 1 pm and Mark says do you think that taxi guy was serious about the driving tour. I said all I can do is call. He said I'll be there is 10 minutes.He was and we picked up our luggage and headed for Dartmouth. He drove us around for 4 hours before taking us back to the airport. We gave him a tip and had hugs all around. 

Now the reason I told this story was these 2 men did more for my self esteem than my EX ever did. They couldn't believe I was going to Scotland to help a family I didn't know. I said God spared my life for a reason 10 years before and I try to give back where I can. I help and old fella all summer so he can enjoy his time on the lake, it could be his last year. My ex has always hated my good deeds. It took time from him his jealousy always showed.

I still keep in touch with both these men, as its said people come into our lives for a reason, they are both like family now. I know I could talk to them about anything and they would have my back, something I could not count on with my own brothers.